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2008-05-12
... 4:08 p.m.
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The twelfth of May
Today at or on 11:45AM, a large ker-THUNK rocked my world when the family court commissioner declared Man and I DIVORCED. I can't say I'm happy about this. I would have loved to have a marriage full of love and happiness, but I didn't figure an alcohol addiction into the equation. I'm not saying I was perfect, or totally blameless, but there is no competing with alcohol. It takes over the life of the person addicted to it, and the lives of those that person lives with. It did indeed take over our lives. But on the other hand, I am happy that I finally have broken the cycle of the addiction. I will continue to be affected by it, but not in as direct a manner as before. And as time goes on, I will be affected less and less by it. It's over, kids. I worked this morning, and CClaus came in looking like death warmed over. She looked like she hadn't slept much, and she was really quiet, which is a warning of sorts. I had Kid and Ember both in to teach them how to order, and she was just CRABBY while they were there. It wasn't until they left, and CClaus snapped at a customer that she finally looked at me and said, "I really shouldn't be here this morning." I had to agree. Cheeky H had office work to do, so she finished up what she absolutely HAD to do, and came in the deli and sent CClaus home. CClaus was sniffing a lot, and her nose was red, so no one was really sure if she was sick, sad or just bitchy. Whatever, she went home, and has tomorrow off, so I won't be afraid to go to work tomorrow. Ha ha. I left about 9:45. Man wanted me to come and pick him up and take him to court, so he didn't have to drive to the Justice Center himself. What am I, his mother? I told him no, since I would be in Port doing some shopping and getting an oil change, and I had plans for after court too, and I didn't really want to go to Port, drive back home to get him, go back to Port, back home to drop Man off, and then back to Port and back home again. Cripes! Besides, Man is always quite testy when we leave Lawyer's office (and I'm sure court would be the same) and I really didn't want to have to deal with it. So we met at the courthouse, Lawyer went over things with us, and then we finally had our half hour in the courtroom. There was no one there but us, Lawyer, a clerk and court reporter, and the family court commissioner. At least Lawyer charged no additional fees, so I'm sure that made Man happy, and indirectly, made me happy too, since I know Man would insist that I pay Lawyer. Since I had no intention of doing that, it just avoided the argument and tension. Hooray for that. Man went back to work; I thanked Lawyer and went out for lunch. I haven't done that in a long time, and it was nice. I can really start to do things I want to, things for myself. In only TWELVE days, I will be on my road trip to total freedom. Woot! The weather was great today, not very warm, but not raining, and nice enough for a walk. The water level in the river is really going down... and I took one picture to show it... 
The last time I showed this cement thing.. 
And the time before that... 
Maybe I will be able to catch sight of Lisa's tree sometime within the next twelve days. So for the rest of this day, I will just be relaxing. No cooking, no nothing. It's my own personal independence day! later
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Kiss
Me!
23 Kisses So Far
purple chai - 2008-05-12 17:57:30
I'm so happy for you, and proud of you, too. You did something that takes a lot of courage -- or gumption, they used to say -- and you saw it through.
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Rattus Regina - 2008-05-12 18:03:55
Congrats darlin!
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wordwhore - 2008-05-12 18:11:54
{{{{{{chaos}}}}}}}
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requiel - 2008-05-12 18:12:23
Wow, I'm sure you are feeling a lot of things today.
Congrats on your freedom.
Alcohol can do some serious damage to families. Our next door neighbors both drank a ton and they were always fighting, cops were always over there, kids were crying. they finally moved then divorced.
I hope you can finally have the life you deserve. (hug)
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art - 2008-05-12 18:26:38
you done well for yourself to free yourself from the bonds of being with an active alcoholic spouse! you no longer are bound to him, and now is the beginning of a new life!!! im so proud of you!! you did what many millions of women are afraid to do, and succeeded!!! congratulations!!!
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Princesscee - 2008-05-12 18:31:07
Congratulations! I know its a sad event, but now you'll be able to continue on with much more chances for happiness and growth. I'm proud of you for sticking it through as long as you have and then finally deciding to take care of yourself. Hurrah to Chaos Independance Day!
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catsoul - 2008-05-12 18:52:55
The sweet first breath of freedom must have been heaven!! Yeah for you!! =^..^=
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Ingrid - 2008-05-12 19:32:22
The further you get from the alcoholism and the person creating the alcolic induced drama, the more freeing it becomes. There will come a day you look back and the relief at not being there will be so immense and you'll feel so natural without it - you'll wonder how you ever lived with someone like that. Never again, you'll tell yourself, never again. (((hugs)))
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Anne - 2008-05-12 20:07:31
YAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!
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Lena - 2008-05-12 20:10:59
A great bit hearty congratulations to you.
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Poolie - 2008-05-12 20:34:29
Huge THUNK! YAY! 12 more days!
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Rosie - 2008-05-12 20:39:28
Whoo Hoo! Isn't freedom a wonderful thing? Yeah, it can be a bit scary, but I think Ingrid said it best. Now you are free to love yourself, and somebody else too, if you feel so inclined. *Hugs*
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Pattypat - 2008-05-12 21:32:39
I'm wishing you all good things. You deserve a wonderful and joyful life.
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Joan - 2008-05-12 21:44:42
Congrats, congrats, congrats!!
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LA - 2008-05-12 21:55:31
Happy, achy, delighted, scared, sad, giggly, joyous and ready to turn the world on with her smile. Did I miss anything in that emotional cocktail? Very glad for you, dear. Onward to the next part! ~LA
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Carol - 2008-05-12 22:06:36
YOU GO GIRL !!!
Let's hope it's all golden from now on.
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bluesleepy - 2008-05-12 22:42:28
WOO HOO! Congratulations! And I cannot wait in 12 days, you start your new life, all about YOU. Hurrah!
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Blue Opal - 2008-05-12 22:52:44
Let freedom ring. :)
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Holly - 2008-05-12 23:09:47
{{hugs}} and congratulations that you are finally done with that. I'm sure you probably are dealing with every emotion in the book right now. Hope its all downhill now. Happy rest of your life ahead of you
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sduckie - 2008-05-12 23:10:09
CONGRATULATIONS!!
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mpeacock - 2008-05-13 06:03:09
YOU are so strong!
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michele - 2008-05-13 07:03:36
Wow... I. Am. In. Awe. I am so proud of you for taking this courageous step. Too many women stay in bad relationships for all the wrong reasons. And I can understand how you'd have bittersweet feelings towards the divorce. This next chapter in your life will be all about YOU! And for that, I am glad!
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Carolyn - 2008-05-13 07:29:48
Congratulations on your new freedom! I know this hasn't been easy, but you've continued to take each step forward. Now you KNOW how strong you are and for the rest of your life (may it be full of peace and joy) you'll know that you have the strength to face and conquer anything that crosses your path. Good luck in all your new adventures! You've handled this with more grace and dignity that anyone I've ever known.
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Did
you miss a piece?
The twelfth of May - 2008-05-12
Mother's Day - 2008-05-11
Saturday bakery - 2008-05-10
Friday from Hell! - 2008-05-09
An early Thursday - 2008-05-08
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